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Page 2 of 2 The truth is that quiet is ultimately the only way to disempower those inner voices. In truth we must come to recognize that they exist and that it’s okay that they exist. Once when I was in my early twenties I was assaulted and left for dead. For years I was haunted by dark and violent thoughts. In order to become comfortable with those thoughts that seemed to come from some violence I did not even understand, I had to accept them, let them be and let them go. Over time they lost their power, I no longer had panic rushes when they would come up. But it took time and it took forgiveness, I had to release myself from guilt for being, somehow the author of thoughts that were against every enlightened idea I preferred to hold of myself. I had to realize those thoughts were a part of me in order to realize they weren’t all of me. In fact they were only a small (but very persistent) part of me. And once I truly heard them they finally went away. Today I have to search my memory for those thoughts; they are more like an old movie that still haunts me a little in the shadows of the night.
Now I no longer need the thrills of risk I once demanded; now silence is usually preferred. I have found what I used to get from thrills doesn’t come close to the joy of sitting in meditation.
It still seems the old belief that I have better things to do often prevails because I am capable of many distractions. Yet even with the distractions I take at least a few minutes daily to shut out the world, shut up my to do list and shut down my body. What a relief.
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